Sunday, October 30, 2005
Posted by maei at 3:53 PM
disgustedi just came back from northpoint, to buy some stationery. on the way back, i came across two very very disgusting people that just ruined my day.
one was the bus driver. the other was some old lady. please do not tell me that i should respect her just because she is a senior. she is totally unworthy of any courtesy from me. and if her family were anything like her. i condemn them. and the bus-driver's family too.
what happened was that this beggar-woman with long greasy hair tied up in a pony tail, dressed in a dirty white t-shirt and pink bermudas wanted to board the bus. but she had no money. then the bus-driver raised his voice at her in chinese "you are very smelly. get off my bus. don't make my bus smelly."
so of course the woman pleaded with him and said also in chinese "uncle, let me take the bus ba... please please." but she had no money...
the driver replied harshly, "no money cannot take bus. get off my bus. take the next one. or go and askt he office see if you can take a bus without paying."
then i offered to pay for the woman, coz she was holding the bus up, then i asked the uncle, "how much is her fare?" twice. but the uncle ignored me. THEN the old lady sitting nearby spoke up, "girl, no need to pay for her. you pay for her once, she'll keep wanting to take free rides."
the uncle spoke again, "no money, cannot take bus."
the beggar-woman finally said, "okay, i'll pay, but i have no money." and turning to the old lady, she asked if she could have 90 cents to take the bus.
the auntie said, "no. i have no change."
so i offered stood up again and wanted to go up and pay for her anyway, but the uncle just shouted at the beggar-woman again and said, "you are very smelly. get off my bus. get off get off. go and ask the office whether no money can take bus or not. get off get off."
and the woman was driven off, before i could get down to paying for her.
then after the bus drove off (and the woman was looking resolutely at the bus driver from the curb the whole time) the old auntie said, " aiyah, this kind of person no need pay for her. no need to be kind. if it were a senior citizen, ah, then of course is a different case." on that, i turned and stared at the woman. like, what the hell??! but of course, her back was facing me, so i was just pissed... "she is still so young," the auntie continued, "not like some old person or something."
the bus driver said, "no, giving her a free ride is not the matter. the thing is, she's got some mental problem. she is very smelly, like shit on herself never bather. very smelly very smelly. yesterday, i gave her a ride, but she stank up the back of my bus. i'm very scared later no one want to take my bus. she is so smelly."
the auntie just said, "yeah lor, what's more, she's so young, not like, she's some old person." then soon, she alighted.
when it was my turn to alight, i wanted to tell the uncle, "it's not that she isn't paying for her ride, i offered. but you drove her off anyway. can't you see she's so poor? or maybe she's just mentally disabled, but do you think it'll be easier for her to get a wash or to get your bus a wash? the bus isn't even yours. the company cleans it every night whether or not it stinks."
but the words died at my mouth. so i just glared at the uncle and strode off the bus. i don't even know if the uncle saw me, coz he was wearing this pair of reflective sunglasses the whole time.
and why the words died at my mouth was because i realised that i had no right to say anything to the uncle, because i hesitated when i offerd to pay for the beggar-woman. if i had gone up and paid anyway, that would have shut the both of them up, without having to say a thing. it would be extemely hypocritical of me to say anything.
but i didn't.
so i can only fume inside, and feel lousy about myself.
but the moral of the story is, not all elders deserve respect. there are so many people out there who think that just because they're older, and they've seen more of the world than we have, that they can view others as inferiors. that others are not deserving of aid. that ony the OLD PEOPLE deserve such special attention. i'm sorry, if you've been viewing the world like its yours through that tiny narrow hole that is your well, then i can only pity you and think that you do not deserve my respect at all, for you have nothing worth my attention in the first place. and if you do catch my attention, it would be disgust and spite.
the selfishness of it all. was she really so naive to think that if it had been a smelly old beggar-woman instead, the uncle would have let her board?
and if the free-loader had been better-dressed, if she had asked, i bet the uncle would've let her board without minding that she was not paying OR that she stank like hell.
and the thing was, that woman didn't even stink. i was in close proximity to her, but i couldn't smell a thing. it's true. and to think the uncle could shout in her face, "you are very smelly." even if she was, that was such an ugly and uncivilised thing to say. he might as well as have cursed her, and it would still sound better.
it is because of such ungracious people that singapore is deemed as an ungracious society by many. it's the ugly side of humanity that plague the cities and the apathy of the rest of the people that let the ungraciousness spread unhindered.
i am not spared from being a part of the apathetic crowd. but i feel ashamed of it at times. do you?
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Saturday, October 29, 2005
Posted by maei at 10:49 PM
*post title*finished my work early today, yay!!! scrap what i said last hight, i won't be hong wang... i'll be... TOKITO! lol... kelvin asked if i could muster up the sinister-ness... dunno lei, i'll jiayou!!1 prepare to be the targets of engela-evil-glares-and-smiles. he has gold eyes... gold hair... it's blondeness again!!! haiz. but think will need to spend a bit of money ont his costume... better start saving up... hm... the gold contacts will be the killer... damn. i thought he first pair of tintes contacts i'd get would be green or red. hm...
i can't find many pics of tokito online!!! help!!! hm... i only know, black/white/blue... that's the colour combi of his costume... maybe i can go ask chevie ^_^ haha.
anyway, i'm very happy, coz i finished my work early today, but i blasted my extra time by surfing online, instead of doing the work i didn't do the previous few days. this is so super sinful. haiz...
and the stuff i did?
i went to play with name generators... here are some stuff:
浜野 Hamano (seaside field) 三千代 Michiyo (three thousand generations) <----- the first time i played with the japanese one (using angela), it gave me this... so i tried "wanching...
猿渡 Saruwatari (monkey on a crossing bridge) 三千代 Michiyo (three thousand generations)<----- like wtf, huh?!!! and they said you can share your delightful new name...
then i tried a kitty name, again with "angela" first then "wanching"
Samantha Merryweather <----- sweatdrop... that's like, a super mary sue name. samantha merryweather... sounds spoilt.
Samantha DaVinci <----- samantha again. hm... can they like tell wanching and angela are the same person? weird.
so i tried an age-o-meter to get my mind off the silly names... i keyed in... 18, and it said,
You are getting old.so i stopped playing *weeps*
anyway, still hunting for tokito pictures. hm... nothing much to blog about, so i guess that'll be it for now ^_^
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Friday, October 28, 2005
Posted by maei at 11:47 PM
super longlol, i cut this off sy's blog... haha... sorry for not informing you first, sy, but i thot it's more a case of spontaneity. i know you bother to read, haha, so happy reading ^_^
1. ARE YOU OVER 18? yes, no, just about so. i'm 18.
2. WHAT IS THE WALLPAPER ON YOUR CELLPHONE? haha, boo. it's a paranormal picture of myself. boo *ghostly*
3. DID YOU GET ENOUGH SLEEP LAST NIGHT? nope. i had a weird dream in the little sleep i got.
4a. FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT ABOUT THIS MORNING WHEN YOU WOKE UP? how long more can i afford to snooze?
4b. FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT ABOUT YESTERDAY MORNING WHEN YOU WOKE UP? same as before.
5. WHAT DO YOU HAVE HANDY ON YOUR TABLE? my desk... let me see, i might find treasure under THIS pile of notes. or maybe THAT.
6. GRILLED OR FRIED? grilled.
7. WHAT MAKES YOU UNIQUE? everything thats in me, on me and of me.
8. ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK? nope. i'm a fan of guiness.
9. FAVORITE HANGOUT? for now, my bed. any nice bed that i can eat, sleep, study, read on. else, PA, kel's place, oac bench. i don't hang much.
10. 3 THINGS YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT? a comforter, writing materials, clothes.
11. FIRST THING YOU WILL BUY IF GIVEN 1 THOUSAND DOLLARS? for now, ff7 piano collection scores and cds.
12. FAVORITE SONG WHEN YOU'RE SLEEPY? doesn't matter. any song works, but smth soft would be nice, like tifa's theme...
13. WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF? tickles. beetles. maybe some pickles (<- nonsense, just added to rhyme)
14. ARE YOU A GIVER OR TAKER? taker ba.
15. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES? you don't want to know.
16. WHAT IS YOUR DAD'S MIDDLE NAME? nope, no middle name.
17. MOST RECENT MOVIE THAT YOU WATCHED? the myth.
18. STUCK ON A DESERTED ISLAND & COULD HAVE ONLY ONE KIND OF FOOD FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, WHAT WOULD IT BE? eggs. soft-boiled, please. or omelette-fied.
19. FAVORITE T.V. COMMERCIAL? the LG fridge one with the jumping human-vegs.
20. FIRST THING YOU'LL SAVE IN A FIRE? myself. then my brinjal soft-toy.
21. YOUR EYE COLOR? black
22. WHAT ARE THE THINGS YOU ALWAYS BRING? my mp3 player.
23. WHAT DID YOU WANNA BE WHEN YOU WERE A KID? lawyer. always a lawyer. i was very very inspired by huang biren in fa3 ting2 gu4 shi4, her line, "wo3 neng2 ba3 hei1 de4, shuo1 cheng2 bai2 de4."
24. WHAT DO YOU USUALLY DO WHEN THE CLOCK TURNS 7 AM? curse at the school bell downstairs. or am too deep asleep to have any idea.
25. THE COLOR OF YOUR BEDSHEET? pink, with lime green quilt covers.
26. WHO DO YOU WANT TO MEET? my daughter. to see if i should marry and give birth.
27. HOW'S LIFE TODAY? the same as if you asked me the question yesterday. or the day before.
~~~
1. Whose picture is it that you keep on your wallet? kelvin's. and a neoprint with shieh yuan.
2. What time do you go to bed? it is the time you wake up that matter, not when you turn in.
3. What was the last thing you did before filling this survey? talk on the phone with a moody kelvin... >_<
4. Who's the one you always meet the most? myself, in the mirror. my family. then shieh yuan, or kelvin.
5. Who's the person you're gonna call if you need help? depending on what help. probably kelvin.
6. What's on your mind right now? some question i'll come across later.
8. With whom do you wanna be to have fun? i can have fun with anyone if i wanna have fun ^_^ but i'd share my fun with the pple closest to me.
9. What movie do you wanna watch now? goblet of fire.
10. When was the last time you went out? this morning. to school.
11. What do you hate the most for now? inefficiency.
12. When was the first time you slept alone? can't remember...
13. What do you want to do for now? sleep.
14. What do you do everyday besides eat and sleep? study. do crosswords. count sheep. listen to fighting and wish i could play it.
15. Favourite pet? cats. and hamsters... eer. weird combination.
17. Colours that make you happy? white, pink, pale yellow.
19. What was the last thing you bought for your room? for my room? a large poster of jay chou that came free when i pre-ordered his new album ^_^
21. Do you cook? no unless necessary.
22. Miss someone? yes.
23. Plan to buy something? not at the moment.
24. Are you satisfied with your life now? i'd be satisfied the moment a's end ^_^
25. Do you like seafood? totally.
26. Breakfast or dinner? dinner.
27. What do you usually eat for breakfast? i don't eat breaskfast nowadays. mostly bread with coffee.
28. Did you eat breakfast today? sort of. instant cereal with 2 pieces of french loaf.
29. Do you recycle? nope.
30. Do you have a laptop? it's not mine. it's my dad's. but i use it more.
31. What's your favorite fast food? fast food is for convenience, not preference >_<
32. Cats or dogs? cats. tall proud sleek white persian cats. or fat hairy (ie. straight long hair) lazy persian cats.
33. Salty or sweet? sweet when i eat salty food. salty when i'm eating sweet foods.
34. City or country? country. farm. ranch. cottage. chimneys.
35. What's your favorite kind of jeans? faded. soft worn jeans. MY jeans.
36. Is kissing normal for your age? i guess so. it'll depend on if dating's normal. anyway, pple don't kiss openly often, so there's no way of finding out. unlike a particular classmate of mine who explicitly asked if i've frenched kissed a guy before. and he didn't say "french kiss". he said "with tongue?" EURGH.
37. Are you athletic? not in the sense of normal sports. haha.
38. Do you swear? used to converse in swearwords. erm. not really. but not that much now.
39. Would you ditch your friends for a date? *guilt stabs* sometimes, i do, i guess...
42. Ever had a crush on a teacher? found some of them cute, but never a crush.
43. Coke or pepsi? pepsi.
44. Sugar or spice? spice.
45. Can you use chopsticks? i guess so... but i can't use them the proper way. but heck, as long as you can deliver to food to your mouth, it's fine, right?
46. Do you like to read for pleasure? definitely.
47. Do you care about getting good grades? pretty much, but i think my standards have dropped.
48. Have you ever fallen asleep in class? always do.
49. Get a job or ask your parents for money? get a job.
50. Is your dad strict? stubborn yes strict no.
51. Do your parents give you enough privacy? yes.
52. Do your parents trust you? yes.
53. Would you trade places (in life) with your best friends..? never.
54. Does your best friend get on your nerves? haha. occasionally ba, but we're rather accustomed to each other's quirks.
55. Do you make friends quickly? depending on the click-factor. then it'll depend on how much we keep in contact.
56. Do you get jealous of your friends? not really.
57. Do you tell your mom everything? no.
58. What do you & your parents fight about the most? grades and relationship.
~~~
1.Name someone with the same birthday as you. Lai Chang Wen. not like you know him. he was a primary school classmate of mine, and i found out about our birthdays when i invited him to a birthday party of mine 3 months in advance. haha. the party never happened, because i forgot all about it.
2.Where was your first kiss? on my cheek ^_^ or on my forehead. or my hands and feet. i was a really loveable baby.
3.Have you ever seriously vandalized someone else's property? can't remember, i was pretty off-track when i was in primary school.
4.Have you ever hit someone of the opposite sex? definitely. a girl hasn't lived if she hasn't slapped a guy.
5.Have you ever sung in front of a large number of people? yes.
6.What's the first thing you notice about the preferred sex? butt. i mean, eyes and hair and build and complexion. oh. FACE.
7.What really turns you on? a good dialogue. i was told i was like a spoiled radio that can't be turned off ^_^
8.What do you order at Starbucks? ice blended mocha. latte. double expresso.
9.What is your biggest mistake? starting this survey... sleep...
10.Have you ever hurt yourself on purpose? yes. when i was young i cut myself with a penknife to figur out if it really hurt as much as it looks. it didn't. it was pretty itchy, but blood was gushing out of my fingers anyway.
11.Say something totally random about yourself. the cardboard in my bedrooom slippers are bunching up and making me uncomfortable. but that doesn't count, i guess.
12.Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity? yes. someone told me i looked like ella in s.h.e. and someone else said i looked like some actress in tuo2 qiang2 shi1 jie3 3...
13.Do you still watch kiddie movies or TV shows? depends on how bored i am.
14.Did you have braces? no.
15.Are you comfortable with your height? i guess so.
16.What is the sweetest thing someone of the opposite sex has done for you? hm... one of the sweetest gifts i received was a folded heart out of the bus ticket bearing the date we got together, ironed flat straight. haha. i recieved an orange 2-dollar note folded in a heart from the same guy too. that's... kel ^_^
17.When do you know it's love? you don't ^_^ it's a kind of gut feeling that keeps you guessing.
18.Do you speak any other languages? nope. english, mandarin, some hokkien-mixed-with-teochew. and the rest... well, i can mimic the mrt announcement for you...
19.Have you ever been to a tanning salon? i've been trying to get a fairer complexion...
20.What magazines do you read? cleo, time.
29.Have you ever been rushed by an ambulance into the emergency room? NO. and hopefully, never.
30.Do you actually read these when other people fill them out? yep ^_^
~~~
1. First Name: Wan Ching
2. Were you named after anyone? herbs yes people no
3. Do you wish on stars? when i saw shooting stars in india.
4. When did you last cry? this afternoon, when i was so stressed out by the drilling noise while i was working.
5. Do you like your handwriting? pretty much
6. What is your favorite lunch meat? fish.
7. What is your birth date? 18 august.
8. What is your most embarrassing CD? i like all my cd's. yes, even my n'sync album.
9. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you? no. like poles repel.
10. Are you a daredevil? i'm a madwoman.
11. Have you ever told a secret you swore not to tell? nope, once, but to another person who also knew about it, so i guess that doesn't count.
12. Do looks matter? yes.
13. How do you release anger? cry.
14. Where is your second home? school. kel's place.
15. Do you trust others easily? pretty much.
16. What was your favorite toy as a child? dolls, i think.
17. What class in secondary school do you think was totally useless? can't really think of one, tho' i'm quite sure when i was in secondary school, i found all my subjects redundant.
18. Do you have a journal? one in my bag that serves as a planner and notebook too, and here.
19. Do you use sarcasm a lot? yes, at times.
20. Your nicknames? are you trying to trick me into answering a question i evaded just now?
21. Would you bungee jump? yesyesyesyesyesyes.
22. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? nope ^_^ my shoes are designed that way.
23. Do you think that you are strong? physically? mentally? what's considered strong?
25. Shoe Size? 7.5
26. Red/Pink? pink
27. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? my attitude. and my chattiness, at times.
28. Who do you miss most? i don't miss anyone too much, because who i miss i'll see, either physically, or mentally.
29. Do you want everyone you send this to send it back? erm. does this look like an inbox, or a blog?
30. What colour pants and shoes are you wearing? flowered shorts and brown bedroom slippers that are bunching up... hehe. bet you didn't think i'd be wearing footwear.
31. What are you listening to right now? *typing sounds clickclick*
32. Last thing you ate? yoghurt with aloe vera cubes. YUM ^_^
33. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? broken
34. What is the weather like right now? stuffy. think it'll rain soon.
35. Last person you talked to on the phone? kelvin... *depressed* he was pissed off with me, i think.
36. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? i'm sure this is a trap to make pple answer this question if they hadn't before. thank goodness i did, so scroll up...
37. Do you like the person who sent this to you? inbox or blog? funny, i seem to recall making a similar statement...
38. Favourite Drink? coffee.
39. Favorite Sport? water sports minus anything to do with swimming. rock climbing.
40. Hair Color? black
41. Eye Color? black. this is a repeat!!!
42. Do you wear contacts? sometimes.
43. Favorite Food? you *growls*
44. Last Movie You Watched? the myth... some one should seriously filter these repeats *bums*
45. Scary Movies Or Happy Endings? scary movies. if they're scary.
43. Summer Or Winter? autumn.
44. Hugs or Kisses? hugs *cuddles*
46. What Is Your Favorite Dessert? cold cheng tng. chendol.
57. Who Is Most Likely To Respond? you. there's a tagboard on my page ^_^
58. Who Is Least Likely To Respond? hopefully not you.
59. Living Arrangements? with family.
60. What Books Are You Reading? none at the moment. any nice ones to reccommend?
61. What's On Your Mouse Pad? no mousepad. but if i had one, my mouse would be on my mousepad.
62. What Did You Watch Last night on TV? i haven't watched tv in ages.
63. Favourite Smells? fresh air. sea breeze. rain. my room.
64. Rolling Stones or Beatles? beatles. because i ahven't heard rolling stones.
65. Do you believe in Evolution or Creation? both. creation of the universe, and evolution of life.
66. What's the furthest you've been from home? new zealand.
it's 1 am now.
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Posted by maei at 7:05 PM
intolerance is the way to stresswas mugging at bf's place today... stupid hdb... really have to choose this kind of time to revamp the admiralty neighbourhood *mutters* the drilling was so bad, it gave me a headache... wah, i really think i'm rather intolerant to noise, when i'm studying. lol. it was quite bad, like some kind of anxiety like that, i just couldn't think, then i couldn't do my physics mcq, then i got pek chek, then all the more i can't focus, and the cycle goes on. and all the while the drilling was pounding pounding pounding...
the worse thing is, i think i'm tired, coz i feel some kind of funny constrictions in my chest at times... which only happens when i'm tired. especially given that i slept about 4 hours last night... and about 5 every night the past few days. it's terrible. insomnia? maybe.
saw tessie when i was on my way back just now... i'm rather keen on joining her cosplay team this year... it's samurai deeper kyo... hm... we're thinking maybe i should do hong wang... but i think none of my subordinates will be there... she say's he's super cute, and super toot. like d[o_O]b er... yes? haha. i haven't seen a single picture of him, that's the best part, so if any of you have any sites to reccommend that have pictures of him, please please please let me know.
i think i'm a bit excessive on my please'es. i think some post back, i also did smth like this. hm...
let's see, i haven't blogged in a few days. i was feeling thoughtful last night, but i can't remember what i was so thoughtful about le, just that i had a funny dream that mixed suzuki cars with "dragon fly races" (for those who read tsubasa, you'll get me alright) and steering wheels that pop out of their axles... like what the hell la. i also dreamt that kel was driving, and he kept asking me to satbilise the car, while he tried to fix the steering wheel back onto it's axle. LOL. and there was this part about defensive overtaking. and something about the car being able to go on autopilot overnight, but at the risk of the passengers' lives. i remember vaguely that he told me," maybe we can go on a vacation in this car, we can take turns driving it thru the night, and if we happen to get tired, it's alright... it goes on autopilot." like what the hell... weird dream. definitely.
went to school early this morning... i discovered the second flaw in my timetable. i don't plan realistically. i wrote "0830 -- 1000 : organic mcq." guess what. there are 7 chapters for organic chemistry, and about 35 questions per chapter. like FABULOUS! i can so totally finish my work within time. WOO~ that rocks man. haha. yeah. then in the afternoon, i planned to do a paper that was already done. zzz. fortunately, that allowed me to catch up on a paper that i didn't do, altho' with super duper uber low efficiency because of that stupid drill *narrows eyes*
just an off hand remark, when i was at kel's place, i heard this guy, supposed;y bangla worker ba, go "chrrrr, pooi." like OMG. kel stays on the 6th floor and i can hear someone gather a ball of phlegm and spit it out. like shit, can't they be at least a bit more discreet about such utterly disgurting things? it'd make any lady blush.
hem hem.
ooh. that's a lot like umbridge. yeah... harry potter's coming out on novermber 17th. i wanted to watch it on premier day with kel, but he's on night shift, so i think the sooonest i can try to get it is 2 days after. hm... must watch it before i go genting.
speaking of which, have i mentioned i'll be going to genting highlands after my a level's? quite cool, i think i'm of age to enter the casinos le. haha. maybe i'll have beginner's luck? haha. but i won't have money to gamble la... like, duh, an 18-year-old should not have much money to donate to casinos. black jack sounds interesting *glimmers* i think i've read too much... haha. anyway, i wonder if i can tahan the ciggie smell... haha.
wanted to say mroe rubbish one... but i'm suddenly void of things to splurt. think i'll go on in my search of pictures for hong wang...
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Monday, October 24, 2005
Posted by maei at 11:12 PM
fightingthe piece gets better each time i hear it. for those who've played final fantasy vii or watched advent children, i'm talking about the track fighting from their piano collections... if you still don't get me... remember the piano piece when tifa was fighting that silver-haired bad guy in the church? yup, that's it. it's totally cool. hee~ i'm so glad i got my hands on it, thanks to yanliang. haha! bui4 kui4 shi4 wo3 de4 yin1 yue4 zhi1 ji4. maybe not zhi1 ji3 yet, coz i'm so out of touch with music, i think i don't meet the requirements to be his ka kee... haha, but he always has the nicest music to offer... i'm a LEECH!! wahaha.
anyway, it's really a damn nice song la. for those interested in some music that'll perk you up, you can look for me over msn to get it. it's super la... it's my new obsession, in terms of instrumentals. it's got the tenseness and the softness both in it... i think it's really THE song to play for the fight in the church... it's tense enough for a battle, but it's soft enough to downplay the violence and emphasize on tifa's feminity. woo~ when the loud hard parts come in, it really makes me want to type with a rhythm, and presses me to go faster... think if they have music this good for most games, i'll just turn into a full-time gamer. lol
they should have music like this, and one-winged angel on those god-damned timed quests in a3... haha, then we'll never fail the quests. or maybe i will, coz i'll be either listeningto the music, or become too ganchiong. haha.
i'm settling into my schedule well, if you wanna know, but occasionally, there'll be unpredicted stuff popping out, like lunch with my mum and bro today, that set me back by about 2 hours. haha. and consultation with mr lee that's already compounded into those 2 hours. haha.
but away from school.
jay chou's new album is coming out on the 1st of november... i can pre-order it if i want, but should i? if i do, i'll get a free poster of jay chou which i'd like, but will never pin up... or maybe i will, and replace hotohori onmy wall... never setusuna or dir en grey. haha. unless of course, i have a nice big advent children poster, then i'll remove the setsuna one... HINT: i want an advent children poster. preferably one with sephiroth, cloud, kadaj... haha!!! shuai ge!!!
i also just discovered a nice old song... not an oldie, no, just a song forgotten by many. it's bai2 se4 hun1 li3 (white wedding) by peggy tsu... it's very sad...
they should play fighting during our papers too. then we won't ever be too slow to complete our papers.
anyway, i feel good today. coz sam lee affirmed that i was doing the good thing for food chem preparations. haha. yay, not because i'm a model, but because i've gotten confirmation from someone other than myself and kel that i'm on the right track. haha!
my thoughts are very randome, just like the brownian motion of dust particles that are constantly bombarded by air molecules.
haha.
i think my blog is a bit unthoughtful sometimes... haha, i've read blogs that areso chock full of philosophy and relfections and meaningful stuff, and i think... wah, what a superficial blog i have. haha, why can't i ever have any in-depth stuff on my blog?
then i realise that i'd be the superficial one if i were to just blog about meaningful stuff just coz i didn't want pple to think my blog's superficial. haha. confused yet?
so my decision, which was made even before i blogged, is that no matter how shallow my blog is, it's going to stay this way, coz it facilitates me the best this way... gets rid of all the stuff i can't wait to babble to anyone willing to listen. haha. coz i'm such a talkative person you see, and i have so much nonsense to say i'd be rubbish if i just babble onto the phone or into the face of someone... hee~ so i'd dump the topics here, makes sense right? and you see, this way it'll be a perfectly wanching-fied blog. coz it's so wanching. like, nonsensical and erratic. wahaha!!!
i think pple will feel out of sorts if wanching started being thoughtful and philosophical.
tho i think a feel a change in myself these few days... ever since i started out with my schedule, i feel like i'm in control. and somehow i feel superior to myself. like, i don't get out of focus so much anymore. i distracted myself a little with music and immediately, i felt like i was bouncing back to the old me. but if i didn't change, where come the old and new me? hm... i think ti's something i need to reflect on... think it'll be scary if i suddenly become such a focussed person. wouldn't be a bad thing tho', but i don't think it's likely to take place overnight... i wonder what kind of a person i'll be when i grow up... am i considered grown up now? maybe i should say when i mature. am i matured? am i not? can a person be mature and not street-smart? street-smart and not mature? or maybe just plain stupid? i think the life of a tai-tai would be the most straightforward. i'd like to be a tai-tai too... but maybe in my later years ba. i want to live the life of a career woman, a housewife, and a tai-tai... hee.
but i digress.
however, with studies, i am proud to say i haven't allowed myself to be distracted much. and i realised that with an objective, actually, i can study just about anywhere, so i learnt that last time, when i said i couldn't study at home, it was just a stupid reason. why i had to mug at the library i also dunno. most pple i know mug at home now. with the exception of some classmates and oac mates who prefer to mug in school. i'm starting to like mugging at home.
and tho' my passion MAY not be in chem, chem is really rather fun to study. coz it's more challenging than physics ba. i think physics is more a si3 bei4 subject than chem in so many many ways. firstly, you've gotta know your formulae. you've got to know your concepts behind the formulae, and then you've got to know all the definitions to form your concepts. and above all that, you must be able to apply your concepts onto sums, which look nothing like words more than your toes do. so it's a whole chain of memory work except "understand your concepts" which is bullshit if you can't memorise your definitions.
but chem. ah, chem is different. chem is like a cake. it has a solid base, that's the sponge cake... those would be your basic concepts like oxidation states, charges, cations, anions, blahblah. then comes the layers of cream that separate your sponge layers... those would be the in-depth analysis of your foundations, like periodicity, structure and bonding... then you've got the fruit pieces in the cream that are the special cases, like groups 2,7 and transition metals. then you've got the cream layer on top and on the sides that wraps up your concepts, like kinetics and energetics. then you've got the other stuff, like organic chemistry, food chemistry, which are the more interesting bits of chemistry, and therefore are like the garnishings on your cake.
yup, so chem's a nicer subject to be digesting. after all, a cake always looks good to eat. of course, it's nearly impossible to finish a whole big sponge cake alone, which is the tough part of chem... there's so much to learn, that even if it's a pleasurable process, it can get tiring.
of course, when i say cakes are impossible to finish alone, i mean sponge cakes... an oreo cheesecake is a different matter. even if i have to take days to finish it up, i'd do so gladly. wahaha!!!
fighting's still looping on my com... super!!!
i haven't been sleeping well lately tho'. when my efficiency goes up, my rest goes down. until i can't rest even when it's time to do so... dunno why, my brain just keeps running around when i'm lying on my bed... can't seem to sleep until i've been warming my bed for at least an hour... and i'll wake up in the middle of the night to find myself not being able to get back to sleep. hm... i wonder why.
stress? i don't think so. i don't feel stress, but i do feel a sense of urgency to finish my stuff, like, i'll fail my examsif i don't. i think that's a form of stress ba... but i don't get like tear-hair-bite-fingernails-tap-foot-gaze-nervously-write-incoherently kind of stress... in fact, i'm feeling perfectly normal, except a constant need to do my stuff, until i can safely say i've finished my day's work. i think that's a nice change from irresponsible, whatsthatword, yes, procrastinating wanching. yup. but i still can't get over that i can't sleep proper... even tho' i don't feel the burn in my mental capabilities yet, i know i'll brun out if i don't get more sleep... help!!! if anyone has suggestions...
hm... i hate milk, by the way, so don't say warm milk. unless cold milk with cereal helps. but i don't think it will if it's the milk part of it, coz i'll pour away the remaining milk, which is about a third of what i poured out.
hm... maybe i should start by turning in earlier... at least at the end of my tossing and turning, i'd get to sleep earlier.
it's 0006hrs 25 oct now. shit. the piano tuner is dropping by later in the day... what happens to my schedule..?
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Sunday, October 23, 2005
Posted by maei at 11:23 PM
food chem rox!when you finally get the gist of it, that is. wahahaha!!! i am a genius. slept right thru my alarm this morning... so i didn't manage to do much of the math n02/p1 that i was supposed to do... which was expected, coz i had to go out anyway (not that it amounts to much of a justification), but i did manage to do a third of it.
but! i plead guilty of not doing math when i had spare time from chem... instead, i spent it doing... chem! haha. coz i was suppoed to look thru my food chem and just do the papers... but i decided that maybe i should drill the stuff in a bit more, since i virtually didn't revise food chem for prelims, neither did i listen in lecture, or do my tutorials... so i drew up a mindmap of each and every subtopic in food chem. haha.
then i chose to dig my own grave and epress my satisfaction of understanding food chem the slightest bit at last, and told mr lee... wahaha. i hope he doesn't mean it seriously when he said to get me to help explain stuff tomorrow >_< never be too happy. better go chiong my storage and processing tomorrow morning.
promised not to turn in too late tonight, so i won't be staying up past twelve. haha. must keep myself fresh to prevent from burning out. scared later in a couple more days, then i oversleep again... i'll never be able to make up for all the work i don't get done... haha.
jay chou's new album is coming out... i want it... it's got a nice name, november chopin. i heard it was dedicated to chopin, coz jay chou likes his pieces. me too! me too! haha, chopin rocks la. his songs... i really don't understand. how can it be that he has small hands (according to my ex-piano teacher, chopin didn't have big hands) and he has such a good stretch on those fingers of his to play all the chords he composed? haiz... geniuses (genii?) are geniuses (genii).
it's my bro's birthday today, so of course, giordano made my money again... i bought a pair of linen pants, and two of those nice lycra tops... can't stand it. mummy bought me a new pair of earrings... and a new bag for herself too. haha. but i saw this pair of nicenicenice dangly earrings which were like, 20 bucks... so ex... but they are super nice la. if i can find the extra money, i'll buy them. gargh... the stall will move at the end of october... and i won't be getting my allowance til november... haiz. even if i can, i wonder if the earrings will still be there... they're sooo nice. haiz.
i think i'm a spendthrift. haiz. i keep seeing these things i want. and i'll buy them. kaoz. but recently, my wardrobe has been undergoing some kind of revamp. coz i'm starting to wear less of clothes i used to wear, and more of clothes that i recently bought, which are rather different. i think it's coz i have this change in fashion sense brought about by cleo ba. it's not necessarily the hippest, but i do thik it's definitely more mainstream than what i used to buy. i'm getting to become a mainstream girl. mainstream fashion sense with mainstream music taste, with mainstream looks and mainstream attitude. mainstream. bah. i used to be... unique. haha, like weird. hm. i wonder what's causing the change, maybe i'm just getting used to the world.
i think my attitude to a lot of things in life has changed since last september when i got together with kel. maybe coz of the experience gap between the two of us, i was pushed to open my eyes bigger to the world, and learn at a faster pace, plus all the opinions he feeds me with. haha. especially since i'm rather whatstheword impressionable, yes. anyway, i don't think it's really an appropriate time to be talking about such a lengthy topic now, since i'm supposed to turn in early. i'll get back to this some other day when the inspiration comes up again ba.
fresh. unburnt. crisp. juicy. the best condition to be in before exams.
sounds like how a veggie should be.
but veggies, plant or human, can't take exams...
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Posted by maei at 1:09 AM
splinter!!!happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you... ^_^ it's 23rd october, that's... my brother's birthday! haha. guilty tho'... didn't manage to get him a prezzie. think i'll just present him with cash. haha. i asked him what he wanted and that was his reply a week ago. hm...
anyway, in case anyone was wondering about the relevance of splinter!!! there is in fact no relevance. haha, anyone got tricked? it's purely because i'm rid of the irritating splinter in my finger. hahaa.
the story of the splinter started yesterday (for convenience, i'll refer to today as saturday ^_^). so it was that yesterday morning, i got this funny splinter in my finger, at the very first joint counting from the tip of the left index finger. so if was stuck pretty deep and kind of hurt me whenever i crooked my finger, so i woke my mum up from her sleep and got her to remove it for me...
it was a sort of mini-excavation project... a small hole was dug, and the splinter was removed with a pair of tweezers that were a bit too clumsy for the job >_< that was... ouch. haha, but the best part of it is that half of it broke and stayed stuck deeper than before in my skin...
haha, so i thought it was hm, okay, just leave it be. then i realised later in the day, when i got a second splinter, that the splinter was some refective material... i think it's the chromed silver or aluminium on my tap that peeled off... so i got worried about the other bit staying in my skin. haha, so another excavation project went on just now, and i finally got it removed.
but my finger's seriously sore >_< that's better than having pus and swelling due to the presence of the splinter in my skin... my god. my grandpa, dad and kel all told me that pus would develop *cries* and that was scary enough...
*pouts*
but actually, i think i'm just whining up here about the splinter coz i thought it was a pretty funny affair -- i never had an excavation into my skin on purpose... zzz.
apart from that, i went down to marina south to help out today. haha. gosh, it was busy. super duper heng it didn't rain... else i think i'll faint from trying to relocate everyone from the open into the limited space we have that's sheltered. then apart from being stuffy, it would become cramped, sutffy, hot, stuffy, noisy, stuffy, and with slippery floors from all the inconsiderate bastards who drop their eggs on the floor and don't alert any member of the staff to do anything about it. and those idiots who shell their prawns and dump the whole mountain of shells on the floor by their tables. all idiots.
yes, they pay to eat here. but this money is also spent in such an ungracious manner it just leaves no room for respect for all those associated with them. for those who know which particular category of consumers i'm talking about -- bingo. i never used to dislike them so much, until i started helping out regularly at marina south a year back or two.
as for those who don't understand, you can take it that i'm talking gibberish to vent out some frustration over some matters that you don't have any responsibility over ^_^
haha. after all, what is a blog for but to rant and babble?
oh! and i took quite a few pictures with my grandma and my mother on my phone cam. then various of my aunt and grandpa, my mum and grandma... coz the really cute thing is, my mum looks like my grandmaloads, and my aunt resemble my grandpa to a large extent... haha. and since i actually look quite like my mum, i thought it'll be fun to take a picture of the three of us tgether, so i can look back at it when i'm loads older and see how much i've grown to look like my mum. maybe then, i can take a similar picture with my daughter (who i hope will look like me, coz i want a pretty daughter ^_^ yikes) and my mum. hahaA.
but other than that today was rather uneventful... quite a sucky day in studying tho'. managed to keep up to the schedule, but not performing up to expectations. JIAYOU!!!
ooh. i quote i ripped off weiming's site (mingyawns.blogspot.com):
having sex is like playing daidee -- if you don't have a good partner, you's better have a good hand. LOL.
(tho' i personally think bridge or spades might be a better choice ^_^)
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Friday, October 21, 2005
Posted by maei at 5:42 PM
laying foundationsstrange, i thought it would be harder than this to keep up with the schedule today, but it seems not so. i've got about 45 mins excess of free time, without working myself too hard at the exam questions... wow. if it's going to be this relaxed, i wonder if it's going to work. i hope it's just today. anyway, i haven't figured if it'll still be so relaxed tonight. i'll be trying a full physics paper3. hm... hope it'll be more challenging.
anyway, it's pretty cool to have a schedule. you don't have to crack your brains thinking of what you should do, then feel lost for another half an hour, wondering where to start coz you're just so goddamn behind in your work even speaking faster feelslikeyou'redoingsomethingusefulinsavingtime.
phew. so all in all, it's started well, and will go well.
i hope i don't jinx myself. XD
i'll be breaking ground on physics tonight. feel some kind of anticipation... coz i don't know how it'll turn out. haven't really touched physics except to do some leisurely reading of the notes... hm... feel very bad about maths too. a bit stressed, a bit scared, coz i haven't done much pure math practice, just stats. then what if i totally screw up my paper1? *shudders* must steer clear of negative thoughts now... can't trip myself at this point in time.
either way, i've managed a c for math before, i can do better at a's. i've managed a c for physics before, i can do better at a's too. now, let's hope i'll do well in all three subs and trash out at the very least 3 b's. and one more for GP. make that all a's. muahahaha!!! yup, if i dream on, maybe i'll do that. BUT! that doesn't mean i can't continue working towards that goal. haha.
you know what? i realised that in my planning for my mugging, i've really left myself no time to do anything except to go home straight after school to mug til night, and work from morn til night on days i don't go to school. which means... I FORGOT THAT MY BROTHER'S BIRTHDAY IS ON THIS SUNDAY and i'm more worried that i'm not going to be able to keep up with my schedule than that i haven't prepared anything for him *buries head* some kind of sister i've become... and i always thought i loved my brother above all else except my parents *stabs* so how now brown cow??? mooooo............ (am reminded of sam lee *dripdrip*) don't sneeze your head off, mr lee. i know the staff room's cold.
okay, so i was saying... if anyone has any idea what i can do for my brother PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE let me know. a tagboard exists on this page. if you would like to leave a comment, you can click on the bottom leaf to the left of this box, and drop a note on the tagboard. arigatou gozaimasu ^_^
*flies off to change out of kimono*
okay, so i'm going mad *pouts*
on a happier note, moonchild is showing tonight on channel u at 2330hrs. gackt looks good. and that guy, that guy... that leadoflunasea guy is also acting in it. and kel said wang lee hom is also starring in the show *gags* i never really had a good impression of him >_< gackt... i like his voice. i think he looks good too. BUT! i still prefer kyo-chi *_* haha. don't have a reliable site to link piccies yet, so i'll save his picture for another day.
to think of it, i've been rather out of touch with j-rock for a long long time. been listening to mandopop for most of the past 2 years in hwachong. am getting MAINSTREAM. that sounds rather sad... haiz.
OMG. what if canoe polo training clashes with PAYCO pract next year?! haha. this is a sign of confidence ^_^ ever noticed i keep going back to topics relating to school and exams? hm...
but i digress.
saw yanliang online just now, on my previous break, and he sent me the fight theme from ff7 piano collections as well as tifa's theme. SWEET. i never knew advent children took the aerith, tifa and fighting tracks from the piano collection. it's so super cool. i will learn it someday. yanliang said he's contemplating buying the piano collection scores from ebay... the cd's and scores for ff 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 10-2, 11... WAH. the guy's selling it at USD385, i think. damn lots of money to be spending in one shot, but damn cheap considering that the scores and the cd for one ff series alone could cost up to nearly a hundred bucks in SGD. funkiness. but i don't have the money... he said he might be getting it himself for his birthday... if he does, i'll pay him a portion of it, and rip the entire collection and photocopy the whole set for myself. muahahaha.
i want the ac soundtrack. that would make me happy for now. haiz... the remixes of the ff7 soundtracks were so supercool. esp the one-winged angel. rock-version! woo~!
i want the ff8 soundtracks too... esp the creepycreepy vithos lusec wecos vinosec (is it spelled like that? the track that was played during the fmv of the edea procession...) and the liberi fatali...
i want the ffx soundtracks too... wah!!! i want everything *hugs imaginary collection* stupid yanliang... make me go and recall all the nicenicenice tracks... *sticks out tongue*
but above all, i want my exams to be over, so i can go back to my activities. i want to go down to PA for pract, i miss the ppl there; i want to make my mask for prom; i want to go shopping with kelvin >_<; i want to play canoe polo (even tho' i've never played it properly before); i want to slack and suntan and listen to music at the poolside (not swim, hahaa); i want to do sooooo many things.
*deflates*
i wonder, do i perform or not under stress? i don't do anything under no stress, and leave myself to be motivated by inspiration, which usually ends up with half-done products. i start crying when i'm stressed out, and i end up smudging my work with my tears. i set up a schedule and i tell myself i should follow it. but i wonder if just following a schedule will work out well. it feels so inadequate, like, i'm just following a schedule, where's the brainwork?
(the brainwork was already done when you planned out the schedule and sweated out over how littel time you have left, girl)
yes, think positive, think positive. haha, it seems no matter how i try, the topic will find itself back at exams. it seems this way too, during much of my convo's with pple. even with kelvin, it's been terrible for him i think, to be worried about my exams and trying to put up with my dazed-ness. even talking with him seem to have smth to do with my studies once in a while... haiz. what to do what to do, it's the exams now, i can't think of anything else, this whole affair is overwhelming me.
let me learn how to hold my breath, that i can dip underwater and immerse myself in the world of studies , ignoring most everything else, for the next 27 days to come. 27 days... 27 days...
it's 1830 now, and i've blasted 45 mins of my time on this blog. i feel refreshed. let me go shower now.
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Thursday, October 20, 2005
Posted by maei at 11:03 PM
yes! it does! hahaa.
finally, reality hits.and ouch, does it hurt.
so i was up this morning, with cramps and i was like, okay, so let's not go to school today. so i pushed remedial off today again, and i told mr lee i would go for a makeup lesson tomorrow together with the lesson i missed yesterday morning.
and i went back to sleep.
and sleep was uneventful. but my day wasn't, so here goes.
i woke up at 1 pm, curious that no one had woken me up sooner, and i found that mummy was already on her way out to the market to buy groceries. weiwei was online, as per normal, and mapling away. i was a little bored, and since i had decided to forfeit breakfast for lunch, i went to the comp, turned it on, and decided that a short game of spades would do no harm. i had intended to blog, but well... my attention went to spades. so it went that i played spades with my brother and some idiots for a while, and mummy came home.
naturally, she got mad, but i wasn't aware of the extent to which she was angry until she stormed out of the apartment even before my grandma was ready to pick her up. i think she just wanted us to get out of her face.
the crime i commited was to start a game early in the morning. and to not end it because i wanted that victory it would add to my streak, and in fact, maybe subconsioucly, coz it was a pretty good game to our favour. but it all meant nothing in the end, coz after she stormed off, i turned off the comp.
which led to a lose-lose situation, coz i was unhappy, so i ended the game, which proved nothing to my mum, coz she had left, which left her mad, coz i didn't have the initiative to turn it off in the first place.
then i called to apologize, but she didn't pick up any of my calls, nor reply any of my sms'es. so that was pretty scary, of course, being the kind of person i am. maybe it's just me, or maybe it applies across the board -- isn't always scarier to be ignored than to be scolded? i believe i would have felt loads better if she had picked up the phone and yelled at me, then slammed the phone down, than if she did what she did -- to just not do anything.
so i panicked, and i think i cried horribly for a full 45 mins. i was so debilitated... is that how you use that word? i was saying... i was so debilitated that i couldn't even eat lunch properly. haha. i don't think i've ever been so scared for a long long time.
anyway, it turned out that my mum had left her hp at the stall last night, so she didn't have it with her at all. i managed to get her in the end when i called my grandma and managed to choke out "get my mum to the phone" before i poured my tears onto the phone to my mum.
if you're wondering why i'm still on the com now if that happened to me this afternoon, it's coz i figured (with loads of help from kel) that it only works out to be okay that i do stuff other than study WHEN i've already studied. not BEFORE, like right after i wake up, when i haven't done anything credible. yeah.
so now i'm sitting here with a clear conscience and my inorganic revision done, prepared and ready for question-firing tomorrow.
above that, i drew up a revision schedule.
i decided (again with immense help from kel) that i should probably bring my words "if i have to mug, it's only going to be a month more" to greater heights. i drew up a schedule that i intend to follow. yes, you read that right. i mean, if i have to force myself to follow it, it's only going to be a month more, right?
in that schedule, i didn't plan for days i'll be going out, so that would mean, i'm not going out anymore. i didn't even mark out the days when kel would be off, so that i could go over to his house to study. if his schedule fits mine, that'll be fine. if it doesn't, then too bad. i'm sorry, baby, but you're right, i gotta prioritize better. so i'm telling you you might play second or even third fiddle to my studies now *bows* sorry.
i'm seriously quite amazed at the schedule i've drawn myself. it has... work planned from morning til night. with two 2-hour breaks which would encompass dinner and all the free time i have.
other than that, i'll have to squeeze time out by working faster, better.
yupz. one more month. just one more month. seriously, it's in fact only 18 days til my a's start.
don't know. have so much to think of. and so much to reflect on. but before all, let me go back to my chem before i turn in tonight. i have a feeling i won't be turning in too early tonight, from all the thoughts flying around in my head.
it's really surprising how an unfinished game of spades can wake a person up so much. maybe i've finally found my motivation. maybe it's just plain fear. whatever it is, i know it's something i've to grab hold of. if i have to collapse from stress, let it be after the a's. i won't have a chance to stress myself so much in the near future. so if i have to place stress on myself to go by the schedule, i will. and i will come out of it fine.
thank you, jonathan, for being worried that i might collapse from the stress. but no thank you, i won't, and i will get out of this better.
i can if i want to.
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Posted by maei at 11:02 PM
okay... now let's see if the date appears on today's post...
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Wednesday, October 19, 2005
Posted by maei at 9:28 PM
tagboard's up!success!!! i have devised a way to manually link my archives... no point getting blogger to do it for me, if i can't make blogger cooperate with this skin. or make the skin cooperate with blogger. haha. i am a genius.
for now, i'll have to be satisfied by the current state of my blog le ba... can't do much else about it le, except to wait for new problems to pop up. haiz. they don't post the times of each update... only the one of the final one. the most obvious problem i can think of now, is that what if they refuse to post tomorrow's date when i blog tomorrow? haha. that'll be tomorrow's problem.
today, i've done...
1.) read group VII
2.) read fluids booklet
3.) completed november 2003 paper I (which was already half-done)
feel so slack. zzz. so lethargic the whole day, except when i was singing...
haha, feel a bit paiseh this morning, coz i was like mike-hogging during the kLunch session with lingzhi and shieh yuan... don't think they sing a lot. especially SY, coz she said it's only her second time going to a KTV. but kBox is good, coz they actually have minus-one versions of jay chou's raps. which is like damn cool. coz all the other ktvs have jay singing along, like they believe no one can do the raps. haha. but it seems i still can't rap shuang jie gun... haha, but it feels good to still be able to rmbr how to rap them, especially since i haven't tried for so long.
i feel like i've improved. coz i can do the high notes i never used to be able to do. maybe coz i use falsetto with more ease this time around. wee~ feels good to know there's some kind of improvement.
but if i can translate this improvement to my grades, it'll be better. escapism from stress does no work. and it makes you lose precious time. "don't say it's too late, or it'll be later." prof ma's very own words.
i wonder how everyone in class is doing... kind of miss them. and it's odd, like i don't really feel like we've already ended our school lives in hwachong, and will never sit for tutorials together again. haiz. and the juniors are still letting a11 hog the oac bench. idiots.
dunno, better get around to mugging a bit more tonight soon. yupz, hope i can keep this blog in operation ^__^
and yes, a tagboard exists on this page. please click the bottom-most leaf.
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Posted by maei at 8:43 PM
other problemsi realised that there's no such thing as providence for an archive on this skin, which is somewhat worse than not being able to have comments... this is terrible... this skin is dysfunctional apart from looking good. i'ma try see what i can do about this... hm. time eating stuff. zzz.
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Posted by maei at 8:24 PM
problems identifiedi can't get my title to appear... and i can't get the link to the comments page to appear either... if anyone can help, PLEASE EMAIL ME TO TELL ME WHAT TO DO. phew. gonna start working on the tagboard in a while. feel so guilty for not mugging today, but i'm just sooo super nua'ed. and so super distracted by the damn ache in my stomach. haiz. problems with an external skin... i can never get the best of all worlds (ps, my title can't even appear in a different colour. zzz...). never mind, i'll work harder. ganbatte yo!
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test blog entry ^__^
Posted by maei at 8:08 PM
hee. finally an attempt to set up a blog after so long of not blogging. hope i'll keep this up, ne? meanwhile, i'll just be doing some touch-ups to the basic template of this blog, and add a tagboard soon ^_^
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